Blessing & curse…

2011-09-24

“the greatest gift of all …”
so mi amigas are running off to the Pinhook soon – that would be the cool bar in Durhamtown where Kym R. rocks the bar back from time to time. Something about a NC Pride afterparty – wonder how much fun that’s gonna be? 😉

Kym R. & Catherine E. are the Midtown Dickens.
They are singing ‘The Road, Pt. II’ from Lanterns as I type this.
That song sits in a playlist I’m able to enjoy ’cause I’m somewhat all together again, at least for the digital detrius of MY life – pics and tunes, all on one hardrive.

my blessings are so great, so grand and often overlooked by a brooding angry soul these past years (decades?) – but I have a hunch that it’s just me – not the world, so there’s hope. I see things I’m sure I’d have missed in my rush through my 20s, headlong into a 30s that led me about and around, if not astray.

back to those blessings, eh? Haven’t been alone in so many years it’s amazing. Lonely, sure. solo, often. As in this short weekend, where I relish the ‘fuck it – I’m gonna do this NOW’ attitude (take that, dishes. I’m looking at you, laundry!!) – and I’m lucky to have the wherewithal to choose.

But I still miss Boo, and hearing that family time isn’t necessarily Disney-esque (she hates that appelation!) makes me sad that I’m not there to at least offer a shoulder and/or comedic relief. Thankfully, “Cylee likes me” was a text I got earlier – look for the bright spot hon, plus she’ll keep you warm on those cool lake wobegone nights…  Ok – making a serious heart opening post while Steve Martins shares his 5 wishes for Christmas is kinda a challenge!

Been with boo for a long time now – probably for the best really.

Curses are easy to list – lack of focus, gumption, follow through, poor timing, cluelessness, impossible paths forward, distrust of yourself, greed, anger, pettiness. Little me stuff, not Big me stuff. But, have to say,  sometimes the consideration for those not directly in my life, probably need to let that shit go.

Ok. Started with the best of motivations, but now I’m off to investigate a rumor of weather (storms make great photos) and Mac & cheese. Can I possibly go wrong? no idea…

ciao,

}S{ | dona nobis pacem |

“Keep Calm and Carry On” or “Keep Calm … and Cupcakes!”